I finally got myself to bed at 5 this morning...the thought of having to wake up at 8 was not my idea of fun but it's all part and parcel of a student's life. I have a take home test due tomorrow and I feel so pressured by thoughts of exams again! Final assignments are also due one week after another and time is pretty much not on my hands..I feel like a break right now but I keep telling myself that the break is coming soon when I finally graduate for real!
I can't wait to graduate but wait...now the thought of getting a real job is getting me down. I don't know which field I would like to go into...I would like to have a life where I work to live not live to work. I'm bogged down with all this at the moment and it doesn't help that I have all this work to do!
Isabel, ME, Cynthia & Stephanie
I used to believe in chances when it came to men...I was so hopeful, that with much effort I would be able to snag the guy that I liked but after many failed attempts..I've given up hope on even trying.
The other day, I talked to Winnee, my favourite Psychology lecturer and I told her about this new crush that I had on this guy in my class...yes..my hubba hubba...I was so excited but I told her about his attraction with older women and with that I let out my sigh of frustration and failure. I told her he was out of my league. And then out of no where she came up with this whole pep talk about taking chances telling me that I shouldn't let my chances go just because I thought he was out of my league. She said that she was once like me and she kept telling herself that that now she's still single. Sh told me that she didn't want me ending up like her and that I should just grab opportunities whenever they came by. I agreed deep down that she was right but then that was before today...
I was having replacement classes in school and then there he was..his parents were there and there she was...his girlfriend..I had to keep smiling to keep from crying..
I guess thats the thing with crushes...when you find yourself getting deeper into it..you should just walk away because it's not worth the tears. Now my chances are really gone because there is no way that it's ever gonna turn out for me.
Luckily, I still have another Hubba Hubba...he's the guy that works at the promo kiosk opposite from me and he is so sexy...he has this look when he looks at you..the kind of look that says that he's up to something...it doesn't help that he is into music and lives to work for his music. He's the silent type and so not my kind but hell, he's sexy! With the other Hubba Hubba...I thought of long term relationships because thats what you think of when you look at him but with this guy Adrian...when you look at him, all you think about is what it's like to kiss him and thats the only thing you can think of...
Chances...when have they even been of good use?...of course there are women who have taken chances and found love but with me..it's not gonna happen.
The wonders of technology...how I loathe and it and love it at the same time. I loathe it because of the fact that I don't own my own personal baby (laptop) or a PDA to get me through the dull moments at work. If I had these little accessories..life would be bliss...well...I try to live the simple life by not wanting these things but then as time changes, our lives change too, and we just need to move with the times. I only loathe technology because I don't have these babies to get me through..
I love technology because I've got friends with the accessories that I need to get me through...I may be at work and totally bored but at least there's wireless broadband to keep me company for a while...I say a while because i won't get to use it for the whole day..sigh..oh well...simplicity!
It's been a while since I came to ease my mind of my thoughts. Well, I've been slaving through midterms and for that I even missed my own birthday! Yup..it came and went and I didn't celebrate. For the most part I think it was because I just didn't feel like celebrating. It's just another year gone by, thats all.
But over the weekend, I was so sick! I had a bad case of gastric and fever. I think this was all due to my stress levels gone way high. So I spent the whole weekend bed ridden! I even missed the birthday party thrown for me by my girlfriends. They had such great surprises for me!!!!! On top of all this, I've also been having some back pains and by Sunday, it got worse. I couldn't even walk. Doc says I could have sprained it due to carrying heavy stuff or straneous activities. Sigh...It still hurts but thank God for pain killers!